Blink Chapter 3 (Part 2)

            Daniel woke in a cold sweat, his shirt clinging to the cave of his back.  He leaned over the side of the bed, trying to recollect his breath while rubbing his sweaty hands in the covers to dry them; the dream, still fresh in his mind, seemed so vivid.  Daniel could still feel the ground beneath his feet as they ran, still touch the branches as he passed by them.  He had never had a dream that felt so real before.  Daniel stood and opened to door, making his way towards the bathroom.  His hand wrapped around the doorknob as the sound of puking reverberated from the room.  He turned and made walked to the kitchen sink where a spare toothbrush and toothpaste sat in a ceramic cup. Daniel turned the water on full; trying to drown out his mother’s fit of sickness as he vigorously brushed his teeth.  

            As we was rinsing his mouth, Daniel could hear his cell phone ringing inside his bedroom and ran over to answer it.  The phone showed that Elle was calling.  Daniel’s heart rate began to climb as he took a deep breath and checked the time before answering her call. “Hello,” he could hear the timorousness in his voice and felt like blithering idiot.

            “Hey,” she replied as if sighing out the very words though Daniel could still hear the faint trails of fear and sadness.

            “Why are you calling at 10 am, is everything alright?”

            “Dad’s having it out again.  I was wondering if you could pick me up?”

            “Yeah, I’ll head that way in a second.”

            Daniel threw on a clean shirt and pair of pants, applied some deodorant, and grabbed some socks out of the drawer before heading towards the front door.  He looked in the mirror above where his shoes were kept and tried combing through his hair with his fingers, slipping into his favorite pair of Vans.  Glancing back into the house with one hand on the doorknob, Daniel patted his pockets down to make sure his wallet and phone were there before grabbing the keys and heading out the door.  He locked the door and started heading down the stairs when he heard the door to the complex open and someone begin shuffling towards the stairway.  Daniel managed to get halfway down the stairs when he was met by Ruth’s smiling face, her hands cradling a box of doughnuts and a drink tray with two coffees and some art supplies.

            “Hey Dan, where ya’ headed?”  She was always high-spirited, but today she seemed especially perky.

            “Elle’s place.  She asked me to come pick her up.”

            “Is it her father?”

Daniel nodded and slowed his descent until they stood face to face at the foot of the stairs.  

            Ruth shook her head slightly side to side as if in disapproval of Elle’s situation.  She stared at the ground for a moment and then looked back at Daniel, smiling as if nothing had even dampened her mood.  “Well, you tell Ellie that you two can come to our place if you need to.  We’ve got extra doughnuts and maybe we can head to the mall in a bit.” 

            “I’ll tell her,” Daniel said smiling back.  “She might need some time before we head over–though–to calm down.”

            “I understand.  We’ll be here.”  At that, Ruth began to walk up the stairs.  She was practically floating, her happiness had a tangibility that Daniel could feel lightening his own darkened mood.

            “Hey, Ruth.”  Daniel called up to her.

            She turned around at the landing of the second floor.  “Yeah?”

            “How was your date with Ryan last night?”

            Ruth’s smile dissipated and was replaced with two bright red cheeks.  She tried burying her head behind her coffee cups and Daniel smiled.  Ryan was a romantic at heart, and Daniel was sure that if Ryan was going to take Ruth out on a date, that he was going to pull out all of the stops.  “It was good,” Ruth finally replied.

            “I’m glad,” Daniel called back up to her.  “I’ll see you in a bit.”

            “See you in a bit,” she replied, shakily and headed back up the stairs to her apartment.

            Daniel ran out to my car and started on the way to Elle’s house.

            She was a mess when he finally got to her and came running out of the house sobbing.  Daniel held her shaking frame for several moments before leading her towards the car.  “My dad said that he wants a divorce,” she blubbered out.  Her breath still choked out in little sobs.  We got in the car but Daniel did not drive.  He just stared there watching her cry, taking her hand in his.  “He said that he can’t stand being around us anymore.”  He tucked some of her bangs behind her ears.  

She had a little makeup on, but whatever job she had made to apply some eyeliner had been ruined by this water-work barrage.  The ink ran like watercolor down her face.  When she finally managed to calm down a bit Daniel turned her face towards his and began to rub off the black trails, wiping the wet ink away on his jeans.  He stared into her eyes, trying to get her to smile, but she seemed too defeated by the situation.  

            Daniel reached across the seat and took her in his arms, kissing her forehead.  He saw that she smiled a little at that and then hugged her even tighter.  After a while he noticed that his buckle was driving into his side and Daniel let go to slink back into the seat, never taking his eyes off of her.  “Are you feeling okay,” he asked softly.

            “Mm-hmm” she sniffled, nodding slightly.  Daniel turned the car on and began to drive away, taking her hand in his once again.

About a half an hour’s drive in complete silence and they arrived at Eldridge Park. This was their go-to spot when they needed an escape from things. Ryan and Daniel had camped here several times as well. He parked the car at the entrance and they climbed out. Daniel headed for the nearest trail, a two mile loop named Three Bridges and they began the trek. 

At first they were still buried in silence, walking a couple feet apart, Daniel’s hands in his pockets. But after a bit of walking he felt Elle’s arms snake around his right and he reached around her shoulders to pull her in tight as they walked. Daniel kissed the top of her head and smiled. “I’m glad you’re feeling better,” he whispered to her softly. Elle met him with a smile. 

They walked for a bit longer down the trail until they finally decided to turn back around and head back for the car, but not after stopping at the first bridge to stare at the waterfall upstream and toss rocks into the water. Their somewhat relatable experiences made times like these much more meaningful. They were both children of drunken abandonment. Daniel did not want Elle to hurt like this, but he understood why she did. 

She was smiling and beaming, back to her old self by the time they starting driving back towards the apartment. Daniel told her that Ruth and Ryan had invited them to go to the mall, and once she did a twice over of herself, Elle decided they should stop by the apartment so that she could freshen up. The faint sound of Frank Sinatra followed Daniel and Elle up the stairs of the complex. It was usual for Mrs. Samson to blare music, seeing as she was hard of hearing and had a killer record player. 

Daniel’s mother was already gone, as always, by the time that they had gotten back to the apartment. He thought about her lifestyle and imagined that it must be terrible for her health. Elle walked straight to the bathroom and Daniel watched from the couch as he saw her pin her red curls up and begin touching up her face with some of his mother’s makeup. God she’s gorgeous, Daniel thought to himself as he watched her procedure. She caught him staring and giggled a little, blushing to herself. Daniel smiled, myself and averted his eyes. 

Elle closed the door, perhaps for need of privacy and Daniel looked for something do with the spare time. He remembered the meditation sequence DVD from the box and walked into his room to retrieve it. A part of him was really interested on seeing what would happen. Daniel grabbed the disc off of the desk and headed into the living room, sliding it into the DVD player. 

He sat down on the floor, legs crossed, watching the little dialogue box that said “PLAY” disappear, continuing to stare into the black nothingness on the screen. What kind of idiot do you take me for? And just when he was about to stand up to turn off the TV, Daniel felt a slow hum enter into his mind. Ease began to wash over his entire body as he continued to stare into the blackness. Suddenly, shapes began to appear, something that looked like Rorschachs began to glitch in and out of frame. Daniel’s eyes began to grow heavy until there was no other sound around him but the soft hum pervading his ear drums. 

He let it sit there, soft and comforting, the world around fading into the black. There was no sense of time. Daniel’s eyes did not try to wander but remained fixed in position of where the TV screen would be. “Imagine that you are not merely falling asleep, but that your soul is leaving this world and going into another… You will know the way…” The words slipped through Daniel’s conscience like a knife cutting through water.  Each syllable reverberating as if bouncing off the walls of his subconscious.  He felt something pulling him, some false sense of gravity.  Daniel let it take him as he slipped out of reality.

At first there was only light, and then there were colors; greens, browns, oranges and yellows. He could smell a new fragrance as the wind brushed it passed his face. Daniel felt as though he could stand in this new place, as though he was anchored here. 

Suddenly, Daniel felt a hand upon his shoulder pulling him from the light and back into the darkness. He tried to hold it, but he was not strong enough. Daniel felt himself falling back. 

“Daniel, Daniel.” He felt someone shaking him. He was back in the apartment now, the faded blue walls felt like a dim prison. Did I really go somewhere else? Daniel looked around the room for a moment before he noticed Elle’s face looming over his left shoulder. “Dan, are you okay,” she asked. She was staring him as if he was possessed.

“Yeah,” Daniel replied standing up. He took a moment to recollect himself, feeling tethered between two places, struggling to all of himself back to this reality. “Did you not see–” He pointed towards the TV screen, but now he noticed that it was totally black. Daniel walked over and opened the DVD tray. The disc was still in there. It did happen, he reassured himself.

“Did I not see what?” Elle said, looking at Daniel with concern.

“Nothing,” he finally said after a pause. “I must have falling asleep or something. Mom came in late last night, and I didn’t get a whole lot of sleep.”

“Okay,” Elle muttered and walked back towards the bathroom. Daniel was perplexed. He wanted to try again, to really see if what had happened was real or simply a dream, but Daniel feared shocking Elle like he had last time. He wondered how long he was sitting there.  Staring at the blackness on the screen a little bit more, Daniel snapped his head around as he heard the bathroom door open. 

Elle reappeared completely revitalized. Her face noticeably enlightened, accented by the makeup. Daniel buried his thoughts of the other place, focusing on here and now. I’ll try again later. Elle had on navy-blue skinny jeans and a yellow, Paramore t-shirt which made her all the more attractive. Daniel opened the front door, with chivalrous gesture, escorting her out the front door. He followed behind, locking the dead-bolt. They walked upstairs and were met by Ruth’s beaming face. She took Elle in a bear hug and Elle smiled back, getting tossed around like a leaf in a hurricane. “I’m so glad you came,” Ruth exclaimed looking at them both. She put her hand on Elle’s back, pushing her inside. “Come in, come in!”

Ryan had already set four paper plates on the kitchen table with the box of doughnuts opened in the middle. He entered the kitchen from the living room, cup of coffee in hand. He smiled at Elle and Daniel as he walked in wearing a worn Pink Floyd shirt and sweatpants, his hair unkempt as though he just woke up but still managing to look like a punk rocker. “Hey there,” he said, running a hand through his hair, his face cleanly shaven from his date with Ruth last night. 

“Hey,” Elle and Daniel said in unison. The radiant peace of the house began to wash over him, and Daniel could feel his shoulders begin to slouch in comfort. Home sweet home.

“Are you guys hungry,” Ruth asked motioning towards the doughnuts. Daniel’s stomach rumbled.

“I’m starving,” he said and picked up a paper plate. Elle followed behind. Daniel picked up a glazed and a Boston cream doughnut, his favorite. 

“You guys don’t have to eat in here,” Ryan said, walking toward the balcony. He slid the glass door open and walked outside. 

Daniel and Elle exchanged a glance. She nodded to Ryan, thanking him, and started walking towards the door. Daniel followed behind with Ruth. Although their apartment complex was nothing fancy and surrounded by the city, Ruth and Ryan had a fantastic view.  The sun was still climbing over the tops of the skyscrapers, and Ruth and Elle laid out on the sun chairs and began talking to themselves.  “Come on,” Ryan spoke softly, putting his hand on Daniel’s shoulder.  “Let’s go get the girls something to drink.”  Daniel noticed that only Elle did not have a drink and wondered what Ryan was wanted to talk about. 

Daniel leaned against the kitchen counter as Ryan began to pour Old Country Lemonade powder into a glass pitcher. He reached into the fridge and threw two lemons to Daniel. “Slice these up,” he said before turning back to the pitcher and filling it with water. Daniel took a knife from the rack and set the lemons down on the cutting board. He began to slice the lemons in silence, unsure of the impending conversation. 

“She looks at you differently now,” Ryan said breaking the silence. Daniel looked back to the patio and noticed, although engaged in conversation, out of the corner of her eye Elle was looking at him. Daniel’s gaze startled her and she looked away. 

“Different how,” he asked, dumbfounded by Ryan’s observational skills. 

“You know,” Ryan said and crooked an eyebrow at Daniel, the corner of his mouth raising in delight. He grabbed some plastic cups and the pitcher in one hand. He began to walk to the patio. He stopped and set his hand upon Daniel’s shoulder, smiling down at him. “I’m happy for you,” he said, sincerity beamed from his eyes. They walked back onto the patio. Daniel sat beside Elle who was smiling at him. He smiled back, feeling a knot form in his stomach. I’m happy, too.

Instead of going to the mall, they ended up driving to a trading post on the local Indian reservation. Ruth had been there last week and said there was something she needed to pick up. The drive out was long but filled with some Phil Collins tunes. Ryan even managed to efficiently drive with his knees to free his hands for air-drumming the solo in “In the Air Tonight.” Daniel and Elle were thoroughly impressed. It was still light by the time they got to the reserve, but the sun was already on its descent. Ryan parked the car in a dirt lot near a group of huts that Daniel imagined were the post. They all climbed out of the car and followed Ruth who walked with purpose. Daniel took Elle’s hand as they walked and saw Ryan shoot a quick eye back at us before catching up with Ruth. 

The post was about ten or eleven huts set up in a rectangle. There were several old women with their presumable grandchildren occupying each hut, unless there was a man selling belt buckles or air-painted tee shirts. Ruth and Ryan dispersed once they got to the middle of the trading post. Ruth made a B-line to an old woman who went back into her hut to retrieve the item Ruth was anticipating so much. Daniel and Elle meandered around aimlessly, staring at all of the different trinkets. 

One particular booth caught Daniel’s eye and he stopped to stare at the items upon the table. There were photographs of cave paintings. He was astounded at the amount of simplistic detail. Daniel heard a sound and looked up to be met by an old set of eyes staring back at him. He smiled at the woman and she glanced over Daniel’s body, her face unchanging. All at once, her eyes livened and she called a young girl over to her, speaking in their native language. The girl looked at Daniel’s chest and then back to the old woman. They whispered to each other again and then the girl turned to me. 

“Where did you get that,” she asked softly, pointing to the necklace around Daniel’s neck. He looked down and took the stone in his hand.  He had forgotten that he was wearing it. 

“It was a gift–from my father.” The girl turned back to the old woman and whispered in her ear. The old woman spoke to her for a moment. 

“My grandmother asks if you have been taught?” 

Daniel stared at her for a moment, trying to understand what she was talking about. “If I have been taught what?”

The girl and her grandmother shared looks and then her grandmother whispered again in her ear. “My grandmother asks if you have been taught to Walk?” 

Daniel looked at the girl’s face; she looked just as lost as he was. He was so estranged by the moment that it was difficult for him to grasp what she might be talking about. Her grandmother stared deep into Daniel’s eyes. The lines on her face seemed to be increasing as though she was trying her hardest to see into his soul. After several long, awkward moments, she smiled without parting her lips and then spoke to her granddaughter once more. 

“My grandmother says that she will see you again soon,” the girl said and then bowed her head. The old woman was still smiling. 

Suddenly, Daniel felt Elle grab onto my arm and start pulling him away. “Ruth and Ryan are already at the car,” she said. “Come on, let’s go.” He began to walk away, still staring at the old woman and her granddaughter, mystified. What did she mean?

Ruth and Ryan were trying to pack a gigantic, brown paper wrapped photograph into the back of their Subaru. They just managed to fit it in and close the hatch by the time Daniel and Elle got to the car. “Whew,” Ruth exclaimed, wiping the sweat off of her brow.

Ryan looked as though he was having none of it and slumped into the front seat, turning on the car and blasting the A/C. Elle nudged Daniel’s side. “Did you get anything?”

“No,” he replied looking at a paper bag in her hand. “What did you get?”

She reached in the bag, accompanied by a crunching sound like stepping through dead leaves. After a moment she withdrew the gift, still wrapped in newspaper, and began to unfold it. She held up to Daniel’s face a tiny dream catcher, the size of a half dollar. The wood stained blue with white string weaving the inner web. There were four glass beads intertwined in the string. 

“Do you want me to put it on you?”

Elle smiled, nodding her head. She handed him the necklace and turned around, grabbing all of her hair, as he undid the metal clasp. Daniel took time to stare at the curve of her neck before putting the necklace on her. She turned around, smiling and planted a soft kiss upon his cheek before opening the car door and sliding into the back seat. 

The drive back was long but Daniel and Ryan kept each other company. Ruth and Elle passed out less than half an hour into the drive. Ruth’s head was cocked back against the window with her mouth gaping open. When Elle began to grow tired she wrapped her arms around Daniel’s and nestled her head against his shoulder. He watched through the rear-view mirror as Ryan raised his eyebrows twice and cocked a smile, jokingly. They chuckled to themselves before continuing in conversation. Daniel tried to focus while they talked, but he kept thinking about the old woman and her granddaughter. 

He remembered what it felt during meditation, the mesmerizing peace, as though he was lying on top of the ocean while being pulled out by the tide. Daniel’s mind touched down on another place, but that could not be possible. Could it? I have to know for sure. He had to go back.

They stopped to grab a bite and the girls jolted awake at the mention of food, which Ryan and Daniel found humorous. After they ate, they climbed back into the car, only about a half hour away from the apartment. Once at the apartment Ryan told Daniel and Elle that he and Ruth were going to take a nap and that they would come get them from Daniel’s apartment when dinner was ready. They passed up the stairs as Daniel unlocked the door to the apartment and let Elle inside.

Once inside, Elle turned to embrace Daniel in a gigantic hug that made him smile.  They separated for a moment only to come together in a kiss. Their lips parted and Elle looked up at Daniel. “I’m going to crash for a bit until Ryan and Ruth show back up.”

“Alright, you can sleep in my room if you want.”

She hugged him again and then walked into his room to lie down. Daniel waited until he heard the door click shut before walking over to the TV. He grabbed the remote and sat down on the couch, turning the TV on. He flipped through channels for several minutes until he felt as though Elle had long nodded off. Then, Daniel turned the DVD player on and switched over to the meditation disc. 

Once again, he gazed into the darkness on the screen. The peaceful humming washed over his. Daniel felt as though the vibrations were shaking his core and rattling his bones together. He let himself slip away with ease. For what seemed like thirty minutes, he floated in that darkness, neither here nor there. All that Daniel could feel was the separation from everything, as though there was nowhere that he belonged. For a while Daniel enjoyed this feeling until he could feel that gravity, yet again, pulling him to come other place. He welcomed it this time and it sent him hurtling through the darkness into whatever lied beyond. 

Welcomed To A House I Once Belonged To

Empty frames and pictures of a darkened age,

I pass like an invisible ghost occupying memory.

The room where she spent her nights recalling,

Lost loves calling, sweeter days beckoning

Now exists, a parlor for the business of

Continuing to live.

 

I dance like a phantom along the stairs,

Smile at relatives never met.

Round corner to the birthplace of my dreamless days

And sleepless nights,

Only the paint holds faded lines of my youth.

Her bed against the wall,

New furniture, snuffed memories.

 

Her and I alike, our shared liberation,

Our shared integument.

The wallpaper of our yesteryears

Cracking, falling like dead leaves,

The desperation of what was to be.

 

I am like they, captured in frames,

Savored like a summer rain,

Parting with visceral agility.

Am I so likened the grave?

 

So well replaced by fashion,

The image now, could it be complete?

I am the seafaring stranger,

The gentle passerby.

A Scrapyard Hunter’s Treasure Chest

Raindrops batter against the tin,
Makeshift roofs of the lifesick and wellworn,
The trodden souls spreading their infectious misery like a cancer.
Look on them, they are faceless,
The lives of the subnormal, as ill-fated as they have
Believed themselves to be.

Somewhere off is stands a man, he trades lost hopes
For a pair of slacks and some tools,
Never explaining their use,
Creating a self-inhibited workforce
Of the misdirected ne’er-do-wells.

The remaining daydreamers and ‘with-good-intents’
Are sold away to the factories of Disillusion and Stale Body,
Digging holes in the ground,
Trying to find the stars.

I climbed atop a mountain of crushed dreams and broken hearts,
Scraping my knees and elbows,
And sat on its peak,
Staring into the vastness of this
Scrapyard of Possibility.
Will they ever see beyond what lies before them?

I looked down from the mountain and saw a girl,
Clawing through the remains of a
Two-seater, First Love,
And they did not survive the accident.
Scratching on the surface of the hood,
She tries clawing her way into the engine
Just to see what went wrong.
She breaks a headlight and talks the bulb saying,
‘I wanted to find some light in all this darkness.’

I follow her through the yard,
Help her tip over an old 2,000-something Memory
And scavenge it for spare parts for our new Per Diem.
We grab nuts and bolts from the daydreamers’ broken machinery,
Gears and gadgets from a vintage Motivation
And in a few weeks it comes alive.

A pocket watch that counts down the moments, reflecting,
When you most felt alive,
The summer breezes and rolling, emerald hills,
Blankets of rain, pillows of sorrow,
And all the comfort that our Diem will always have a part of our Memories,
We are all the same, and yet we are all scrapped from the same parts.

She took that light bulb and brought it to a toy lighthouse,
Housed it in its fitting, watching the rays dance through disambiguation
And stared into the light,
‘We’ve finally found it’ she says,
‘No, I found it when I found you.’

Longing Louder Than Distance

Let us away,
Your lips, the beautiful sin and I have never
Trespassed. Holy, your words are my heaven.
Let me ascend, caught up,
The revelations of light, catching in your eyes.
Your smile, the first twinkling of star formed
And I am the blackened space,
Keeping you, holding you tight.
Be at peace and let us float together,
Two rafts upon the oceans waves,
Tossed separate ways by the same fates.
And yet stretched thin, when the stitches are pulled together
Let us become one.
Let the sighs of your heart be the breaths of my soul,
To take in all of you, filling me with your silent light.
Beauty, two wooden hearts carved into boats to try and float,
But let me sink with you.
Let the waves come,
Let them crash upon the shores or against our hearts.
And get lost as sea,
With me, by your side.

Hands That Speak

You paint my veins with your words,

Each syllable bringing color back into the life I had thought was spent.

Reach inside me like a horologist,

My clockwork sprawled upon the table of your wonder and desire.

You arrange my gears, remove the excess glass and broken hands

From the times I thought I knew my place,

A different face for a different world,

All the more alive in your presence.

 

You are a cold winter on a mountainside,

The sheer beauty yet intangible silence

That crawls in your spine,

Making you feel your heartbeat just to know

That you still exist.

 

You draw my breath away, you holy gale,

Carry me out to your waters.

Come, oh violent passion,

Oh indomitable desire.

Let your voice be the harbinger

Of all my life has ever yearned for.

 

You carry my crown,

To have your love would be

To possess all material wealth of this wanton world.

Make me your royalty.

Taken Up, Looking Back (Tethered V)

The wind still rises over the oaks,
Still crests the evening horizon,
Gossamer waves of light painting their
Magisterial ambers and scarlets.
 
The moon still shares her sky with lovers
As they dance under the twilight,
Your coupled stars, forevermore intertwined.
 
And the sun still rises with each morn,
Each day passing with the fury of these
Nine years passed, time too short
To measure the struggle of a heart
Aching to return home.
 
And you made your way,
Still smiled, delighted in each moment passing,
Loved each person with more than we could give back,
Still showed us incomparable strength.
 
But now you have gone over,
The buck at your window, calling tenderly,
‘Come with me, love,
Over the mountains,
To where the sky embraces us as one
Where the shattering storm is our consummation
The rolling thunder, the drum of our single, beating heart.
Come with me, love,
Come with me.’
 
You took his hand, and with you,
Pieces of our hearts, parted pictures, singed corners.
We watched from the wing as you took flight,
The stillness of your heart as you were ready to leave.
 
A better place has no better company
Than the nearness of your voice,
Your gentle spirit, loving grace.
We are only reflections of you.
 
And how are we to reflect
What is lost in the glass,
Taken afar,
Our love only answered in quiet moments
Stolen, to hearts that beat for every “I love you”
You never had the time to say.
 
And I will say it for you,
To lose you now is to have the best of you,
To see you fly teaches us the strength to soar.
To love you now means to love you forever.
To say goodbye only gives us a chance to say hello
When you welcome us home.

Blink (Chapter 3 Part 1)

Chapter 3

†Ѡ†

After a couple hours, Daniel had taken Elle back to her house.  When he got back inside the apartment he plopped down on the sofa, and kicked  his legs off the arm.  Hands behind his head, Daniel marveled at all that had transpired today, beginning a relationship with his best friend.  I don’t even know how to be a good boyfriend, Daniel thought to himself.  He  had not dated much, but in the time that he had girlfriends, Daniel never seemed to keep the relationship lasting long.

He grabbed a Coke from the fridge and sat back down on the couch, mesmerized.  Things were definitely on a turn for the better, and Ruth and Ryan would get a good kick out of the news when Daniel told them that he and Elle were dating.  Ruth would probably even invite Elle over for dinner to share in a little gossip about our new relationship.  Daniel’s stomach dropped.  What do girls even say when they talk about boys?

Daniel’s mind was a flurry of anxiety and elation.  He had no idea what to do with all of this pumping adrenaline.   He was either ready to run a mile or to pass out cold.  Staring at the Coke in his hand, Daniel began to think back to what he had read on the bathroom stall in Bear Creek.  Check your closet, the thought popped into his head as if his fate was talking inside of his head.  What could he want me to find?

Suddenly the front door burst open.  Beth, Daniel’s mother, dragged herself into the house, sluggishly throwing her purse onto the kitchen counter.  It fell off of the side, the contents spilling out onto the kitchen floor.  Daniel shot up and braced her slouching frame against his own, leading her further into the house.  This was their routine on most nights if Daniel had not already fallen asleep.  If he had, Daniel could most always find her passed out on the couch the next day.  He never understood why she would continue this vicious cycle, that was until he saw her picture in Bear Creek.  Daniel stared into her glazed eyes as she gawked at the floor, lost somewhere in the deep recesses of alcoholism.

Daniel laid Beth on her bed and began to take her shoes off.  For once, he could understand more what she was doing to herself.  He used to just think that she was a ridiculous alcoholic, hell-bent on drowning out the world.  But now, Daniel understood that she was a broken heart trying not to feel.  He tucked her in, turned off the lights and slid her covers over before exiting the room.  Daniel knew she would not want the bright rays of the sun creeping in to dispel her much-needed rest.

He crept quietly into his room and sprawled out on the bed. His mind beginning to grow in sympathy for his mother, but suddenly Daniel was reminded of the note in Bear Creek and his gaze snapped up to the door standing at the edge of the bed. Daniel stared at it for several minutes before throwing his legs off the side of the bed and standing up.

His eyes would not wander from the brass door knob, fingers tightening as he pulled the door open slowly. Daniel began to scan around the closet, waiting for something to jump out at him or grab his foot like some psychotic, horror movie, but nothing happened. Instead, Daniel’s eyes scanned the floor of the closet and he found it; a dark oak box with a padlock on the front. He had not been allowed to try and open the box for years, and after some time he had forgotten about it completely, but now Daniel knew it must have a purpose.

Daniel picked up the box and sat it on his bed, the dark, stained wood had an eerie essence. He looked at the face and noticed a gold-plated keyhole on the bottom of the lock. His mind swam through the possibilities of where the key could be. He scanned around the room as the memory of one of the letters he had received from my father entered his mind like a photograph.

“When you find the beginning of truth

The key can be found where the monsters hide.”

At least the man is beginning to make sense in a cynical, Dr. Seuss kind of way. Daniel dropped to his knees and found an envelope resting under his bed.  Struggling to get his fingertips on it, Daniel managed to slide it out from under the frame. The envelope was taped closed. He ripped it open with his finger and took the letter from inside. It was a heavier parchment than his previous letters. Daniel opened it and realized that there was a brass key taped to the inside. He ripped the key out and began reading the note.

“Daniel,

My reasons for being absent cannot be justified in this letter. I would much rather have that conversation in person. I hope that the contents of this box will be your saving grace from this reality that I know must be tormenting your mind. I left these behind so that you would have a chance to get to know your old man a little better. It will all make sense in time. Perhaps I will get to talk you soon. 

See you on the other side,

Augsten Hartt”

Daniel looked back at the box, key in one hand and the letter in the other. He set the letter down upon the bed, thinking about the box’s contents. Daniel began to think his father was an assassin and perhaps he would find throwing knives and two .45’s inside. His hands trembled as the key fit into the lock and it clicked open. Daniel removed the lock and began to lift the lid.

Inside of the box were two black notebooks, a second letter, a DVD and CD-ROM, a government passport, and a necklace with a dark blue, smooth stone that had a carving of white, concentric circles. Daniel took out the contents and set them all upon the bed. The passport read “HARTT, AUGSTEN.” He had brown hair and piercing, gray eyes. A much more defined face with a lot more lines than when he was smiling and carrying on in the picture at the bar. He now had a much more serious look to him, almost regal, and Daniel wondered if his mother had ever seen this side of him. He at least looked the part of an assassin.

He opened up the first of the black notebooks and noticed that it was blank. Daniel set it back upon the bed and opened the second. There, in that same elegant handwriting that composed all of the letters he had sent, he found scientific documentation on parallel universes and his description of a “Second Earth.” Daniel tried to read through the documents but it seemed too far out and he set the book back on his bed. He took the two discs out of the box and examined them over before opening the letter.  Enough with the letters already, he thought to himself.

“Daniel,

I am glad that you have found this.  I had hoped that your mother would not have thrown this away when I left.  She always did have a quick temper and I did not leave under the best circumstances.  Know that my thoughts have always been of you.  I left with the intention of keeping you and your mother safe, although right now it might not seem that way.  All will be explained.  The notebook that I have written in is for your study as you begin to reawaken your gift.  See, when you were younger I was teaching you how to dream.  Not to dream as others dream, but to venture into new places, new worlds.  Do you remember that?  I know that it might have been some time since you have tried to ‘dreamwalk’ last.  The DVD and CD are meant to help you. On the DVD is a meditation sequence that we were given to help us get into a dreaming state.  Imagine that you are not merely falling asleep, but that your soul is leaving this world and going into another.  You will know the way. 

See you there,

Augsten”

 

†Ѡ†

 

That night Daniel dreamed of his father.  They were running through a strange forest from something.  “Run Daniel,” his father screamed, pushing Daniel ahead to check if they were still being pursued.  Daniel’s heart was pounding in his chest, his feet and lungs burning.  He had no idea how long they had been running for.  He continued ahead, pushing branches out of his way.   He almost stopped when he heard my father catching up behind me.  His father matched Daniel in stride as they hurdled over a fallen tree.

“How did he find us,” Daniel yelled.

His father remained silent, his gaze focused forward.  They ran harder, Daniel’s lungs prepared to burst.  An arrow whizzed past them and buried in a nearby tree.  He glanced back but there was nothing in the woods behind. Daniel’s father turned sharply and began to head towards the mouth of a cave.  He followed as fast as hid feet could take him.  They were nearly blanketed in the darkness of the cave’s mouth when another arrow sang and bedded itself in his father’s back.  “No,” Daniel cried as he lunged for his father, watching him fall to the ground.  He landed beside him as his father’s body fell heaped on the ground.  He could not be dead.

Tethered III

Twelve minutes hold your life between their hands,
The sands of time slipping all too fast, receding through the neck of the hourglass.
Mortal ties of medication are your anchor ropes,
Convulsing as we tried to pull you back to shore.
We have let your ship stay anchored in the harbor
And now the fleeting seconds,
Each a treasured memory cast from the bow like useless cargo.

Nine minutes have promise,
Nice minutes have sorrow.
Could we have ever prepared,
Could we have ever imagined.
A dozen hands preparing to take the halo,
A dozen deck hands hoisting the anchors, spreading the canvases.

Four minutes and they are standing at your door,
Sitting in the waiting room of the ER.
The musty smell of deadweight and decay writhing through hospital wings.
The reap stands bedside, curiosity as he remains sentient,
Lips moving slower than hearts if they could speak themselves.

Two minutes and the sun continues its descent over the hills of blue grass,
My car, never taking me fast enough to be by her side.

One minute,
My hands continue to sweat,
Stomach tying into a monkey’s fist.

Time.
Wait.

Tethered II

Irony has itself, voracious set of claws,
That you would fall the same as he
Now stuck inside Fate’s vestigial slumber.
Do you dream,
Do you hear the quiet sobbing
Sighs of exasperation falling around your face like raindrops.
They fear you are gone,
Weeping tears renewed from this now two years of dread,
Your descension.

The IV, Bipap, halo, your remaining roots with their worth
The world, A slow rhythmic droll of mechanized life force.
Asleep.
Canopies of blackness surrounds,
A pale body strapped to the sounds, chirping machines, the artificial birds of your anesthesia reveries.
Yet here he comes, the very same day
A beaming of light through the weary eyes of your onlookers,
A child born of sorrow, born of hope.
Will you ever see him,
Will you ever breathe in the smell
Of life, sweet deliciousness of vitality
The nectar of our days we can never measure,
Yet take for granted whilst you slumber.
Cesarianed from reality, you are now a jellied child to the enterprise of the precipice.
This world and the next floating between your fingertips,
And which strings will you pull?
Which door will you open,
To return to your pain, our momentary relief,
The loss of a lover, the struggle of a decaying shell.

Or will you look on, find him again in the rolling mountains of Everafter,
Afar, floating away and all that is left are the picture frames,
Memories that slip no matter how arduously we strain to remember.
Death is complete but forgetting is final,
Life, be it fleet, has but it’s momentary joy, endless denial
Of the ones taken abroad.

Sleep, rest from pain,
Rest from weary eyes and hanging shoulders,
Sloughing off remains of broken heartstrings and fragmented memories.

Staring at my closet as I pick out my clothes
For what might be your funeral.
I am ready to see your face.
At the house two outfits already hang,
The family expecting the familiarity of woeful circumstances.

I thought that I would be much stronger than I am,
Staring out my apartment window, watching chickadees and fighting the flood wall of emotion.

“Your grandpa died at Christmas,
Todd at Halloween.
Might give July 4th
A whole other meaning.”
Could this really be the end?

Blink (Chapter 2)

Chapter 2

†Ѡ†

Bella Elizabeth Owens had been Daniel’s closest friend since middle school.  She preferred to be called Ellie by her friends, but Daniel was given the special privilege to call her Elle.  She was about five foot six with wavy, red hair and sky blue eyes with just a hint of yellow flakes; she was gorgeous but terribly shy.  Albeit Daniel, Elle only had need of a handful of friends, not that the guys in school were not interested in getting with her.  Daniel could recall weeks spent in gym class hearing guys retell prideful stories of female conquests and their new, desirable partners.  Elle was never far down the list on the school’s male population’s top ten most attractive girls in class.  She never really seemed to have an interest in any of them, though.  The Stone’s persuaded Daniel on several occasions to invite Elle over for dinner, and she would sit out on the balcony, soaking in Ryan and Daniel playing their duets.  Sitting in one of the sun chairs that Ruth had bought for tanning, Elle and Ruth would sip tea and chat.  In this reality of a non-existent parental figure and seemingly foster parents, Elle was the anchor that held together Daniel’s world.

Elle lived about two miles away in Archer’s Terrace.  A communal set of apartment complexes set up like prison quarters.  Mr. Richardson, the landlord was a cranky, old drunk who now spent his time chasing kids on skateboards and giving hell to those who were late on rent.  He seemed to care a lot for Elle, though.  Her father was an abusive alcoholic, and although Richardson sat in the same boat, he showed a lot of sympathy for Elle and tried to protect her.  Her mother was just as bad off as her father was.

The few times that Elle had allowed Daniel into her house, if she had forgotten a hairpin or her purse, he had noticed the tragedy of her life.  Their house looked as if two pro wrestlers had gone to town in every room.  A shattered vase sat atop the front windowsill, the used-to-be flowers withered and drooping off the couch underneath.  They never watched TV because on one of her father’s drunken rages he had thrown a fifth of Jack into the TV screen.  The place smelled of smoke, cheap beer and Febreeze.  But no amount of scent masking could cover up the way that you felt when you walked into this house.  Darkness and depression seemed to seep through the walls, and Elle only had the option of staying hidden in her small, upstairs room with no door.  She cowered in fear whenever her father would come home or her mother was on withdrawal from whatever drugs she was on.

There were a couple months out of every year that either her father would try and make the promise to quit or her mother would have gone through rehab. You could always tell when this was going on because Elle was always a bit livelier and more adventurous during this time.  The money that now was not being used to buy drugs was often given to Elle to go to the movies with Daniel.  They would always have a lot of fun, but you could see behind her eyes that she was waiting for the armageddon of her parent’s backsliding into their old habits.  It was never worth the hope, because hope at times cannot outweigh the way things simply are.

Daniel parked his car on the side of the road and began to walk over to her family’s apartment.  There were a couple of residents walking around, an old lady with tennis balls on the end of her walker, not taking notice to anything else in the world other than her destination.  There were also several people outside sitting on those small, white plastic chairs puffing smoke out of their Marlboro’s as if they were trying to make clouds in the sky.

He reached her door, number 726C and knocked on the screen door.  Elle’s mother was the first to answer, glaring at Daniel as though she expected someone else.  He smiled politely and she slammed the door his my face.  “Bella,” she screamed up the stairs.  Daniel waited patiently as he heard footsteps retreating back within the house.  After a few moments he began to hear Elle running down the steps.  She stopped near the end of the staircase, collecting herself.  Daniel chuckled lightly and smiled.  Elle walked down the remaining steps and opened the door, her face beaming with delight.

“Hey,” she gasped, tucking some loose bangs that were in her face behind her ear, her breathing a mixture of excitement and nerves.  Daniel was never one to really get nervous or excited, but being face to face with Elle formed a knot in his stomach the size of a small boulder.  He glanced over her outfit.  She was wearing a white camisole with a blue, crocheted sweater that matched her skirt.  It came just passed her knees revealing her white legs and her favorite pair of navy blue flats.  Her deep, crimson hair hung in loose curls down her shoulders and back.  To be honest, she was stunning.

“Hey,” Daniel blubbered out, still lost in thought.  Idiot, he thought to himself.  Elle laughed a little bit, and Daniel laughed in return, the tension of the moment sliding off of him.  “You look amazing.”

Color swelled into Elle’s cheeks and she glanced to the floor shyly.  Daniel opened the screen door and reached out his hand.  She took it, smiling, her face darker than before.  Daniel’s heart was as loud as a high school drum line.  He walked her over to the passenger door and opened it for her.  “Thank you,” Elle said sliding into the passenger seat.

Ryan had tried to teach Daniel manners while he stayed at their house.  “Chivalry,” he said, “is a dead art, but the most meaningful of all.”

They pulled into the parking lot of Bear Creek and parked right next to the front door.  As a precaution, Daniel needed to know that if he had to high tail it out of the bar he could do so quickly and efficiently.  Plus, it was a good gesture to not make Elle walk across the entire parking lot.  Daniel walked over and opened her door for her, taking her hand to help her out of the car.

Elle looked Daniel over, concerned.  “Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I will be,” he replied.  “Thanks for coming,” he mumbled into her shoulder giving Elle a quick hug.

She smiled, briefly.  “Thanks for taking me on a date.”

The inside of Bear Creek looked just like your typical Outback or Applebee’s.  There were mementos of the old town, laminated newspapers and shadowboxed photographs of historical, small town events.  “How many,” the waitress behind the podium asked.

“Three,” Daniel replied, looking at Elle.  She smiled up at him, but you could still see that concern in her eyes.

The waitress, Susie, from what her nametag read scanned over the seating chart sitting on the podium.  After a brief moment she grabbed three menus and sets of silverware from the cabinets behind her.  “Right this way,” she said with a droll retort.  Today must not have been a good day for her.  Daniel motioned for Elle to walk ahead of him as he followed her to the table, his eyes sweeping over the entire restaurant for a man that seemed out of place.

Susie sat them down at a booth in the back corner of the restaurant.  Daniel was somewhat thankful, not knowing—if his father did show up—how the conversation might ensue.  Elle slid in first and Daniel sat down beside her.  A much peppier waitress came up next to get their drinks.  They gave her their order and she danced away.  She definitely livened the mood.  After a few minutes of silence she returned with the drinks.  Daniel sipped from his Coke as his mind continued to swim with thoughts.  His body felt tense, his heartbeat slow but labored.  Is he really here, Daniel thought to himself.

Elle could sense the anxiety building and slid her hand into his.  Daniel looked over at her, somewhat surprised.  “I’m here for you, Dan,” Elle’s smile saturated in affirmation, easing Daniel’s nerves.  He still had so many questions that needed answered.  Why did he leave?  Was it something that I did?  Why did he want to see me again?  What the heck were all of those letters for?

Thinking of Elle’s hand in mine gave Daniel the ability to muffle those maddening questions.  He watched her curiously; she was staring down at the menu on the table.  Is this really a date?  Daniel’s mind began to think of other things, thoughts of their relationship as friends and the portrayed affection from Elle.  They had known each other for so long, and never talked once about dating.  Daniel had told her about girls that he thought were cute and occasionally Elle would be the one that he would run to after a horrible breakup.  After all these years, did she really want to date me?

Daniel wondered to himself why he had never felt feelings for her before.  Now, looking at her face, tracing the edges of her smile as she tucked some loose strands of her hair back behind her ear Daniel truly felt like he had understood.  He did have feelings for her, a lot of feelings.  He thought back to middle school and remembered how attractive he thought that she was, but whenever they were together it never seemed as though she was interested in him.  She was hardly interested in any guys.

Elle looked up at Daniel, catching him in his daydream and their eyes connected.  It was as if our emotions were suddenly made clear to each other, jumping from one another like lightning in the clouds.  He could read her eyes as though they were a book and felt himself leaning in towards her, caught in her gravity.  He wanted to be.  Suddenly, as if slapped in the face, Daniel’s stomach did a double backflip.  He pulled away sharply and began to slide out of the seat.  “I’ll be right back,” He said rushing to the bathroom,  still feeling her eyes following him as he hurried away, bewilderment sprawled across her face.

Daniel quickly opened the door to the men’s room and checked, briefly, to make sure that there was not anyone else in the restroom.  Darting into the nearest stall, he sat there for a few moments trying to calm himself down.  All of these emotions for Elle hit like a tsunami.  He had suppressed that infatuation for years and now everything was coming back up.  Daniel buried his head in his hands for a few minutes.

After he had finally got the level on his nerves, Daniel looked at the walls of the stall.  Along the sides were the same ignorant junk that was either written in with sharpie or somehow carved into the metal panels.  Daniel scanned over a lot of it, but it was what was on the inside of the door that caught my eye.  Written with sharpie, his handwriting indistinguishable among all of the useless phone numbers and what not:

Do you remember how to dream?

                                    I had taught you once before                                   

Check your closet.

There is no way that it is him, but the handwriting on the wall was the only thing that was not in chicken scratch.  How could he even have known that I was in here?  Daniel got out of the stall and walked into the other, opening its door to check and see if the same thing was written on there.  Nothing.  Daniel looked at the writing once more and then pulled out his phone to take a picture of it.  Just as the camera snapped, another man barreled into the bathroom looking much worse, cupping his hands, his face pale.  Daniel hightailed it out of there before things got rough; the sounds of the man puking began to follow him out.

As he began to walk back to the table, Daniel glanced over at the bar.  Above it hung pictures of different people in town.  He walked over, curiously staring at each one.  His old middle school teacher and his wife were there, a lot younger and a lot happier than Daniel had ever seen him in school.  And then he saw it.  His mother was sitting in one of the booths, her face radiant with joy, and there was a man in the picture with her, his arm around her shoulders.

“You look just like him,” the bartender said eyeing Daniel.

“Wait—what?”  Daniel stared at him, bewildered.

“Your father, you look just like him.”

“You know my father,” Daniel asked in shock.

“Yeah, Beth and him used to come here with all of the guys every weekend.”  Only Daniel’s mother’s good friends would call her Beth.  He could not take his eyes off the picture, studying the man’s face who apparently was his father.  “She still comes by here every Thursday,” he said.  “She sits right there,” pointing to the seat in front of Daniel, “and she stares up at that picture for hours.”

Grief took hold of Daniel’s heart.  How long has she been doing this?  He finally understood her a little bit more, and it just made his heart reach out to her.  She might just be going out to get drunk every night, but perhaps she was trying to forget about him, like Daniel had been doing.  Or perhaps she was missing him more than he could possibly know.

“I didn’t know.  Thanks,” Daniel replied and began walking back to his seat.  His feet could barely move and he felt like he was floating, thoughts suspending him in the air.  Daniel felt heavy, like there was some weight just dropped upon his shoulders.  It felt like an eternity until he finally made it back to the booth, Elle watching him the entire way over.

“What happened,” she questioned.  “Did you see him?”  Fear and worry covered her eyes.  Daniel was so thankful for her concern.  She wrapped her arms around his as he took his seat.

He laid his hand against hers and stared into her eyes.  Trying to guess at what her reaction would be to what he was about to tell her.  “The bartender told me that mom has been coming here every week.  There’s a picture of my dad up at the bar, and he said that she will come here and just drink and stare at it.”

Elle’s eyes absorbed every word.  Her ability to sympathize seemed unparalleled.  She had an uncanny knack of being able to put herself into your shoes.  That is why Daniel always loved coming to her about friends, school or his parents.  She was always so understanding.  “I’m so sorry.”  It might not have seemed much to say, but Daniel knew that, from Elle, that meant the world.  The waitress came back and added some more cheer to their doom and gloom.  Daniel and Elle ordered their food and the waitress went back to the kitchen.

Daniel did not understand why he could not bring myself to tell Elle about what he had read in the bathroom.  Perhaps because he still could not believe it himself.  His hand came to rest upon his phone sitting in my pocket.  He thought back and wondered if the picture really was there or not, but he decided to wait and check at a later time.  Daniel just wanted to enjoy this time with Elle.

They talked about Mrs. Mayweather and her vendetta to see Daniel in detention.  He asked her about her plans after high school and who she planned on taking to prom.  “John Martin is planning on asking you to go,” he smirked.

“I don’t want to go with John Martin,” Elle replied casually.

“Well, who do you want to go with?”  She stared at the table; her face began to turn bright red.  Daniel’s stomach turned again from anxiety, but he also felt comfortably happy in this moment.  “Elle, would you want to go with—“

“Here you go,” the waitress chimed in, carrying their meals on a large plate.  She looked over at the menu and empty booth across from us.  “No show,” she asked with a hint of wonder.

“No, I guess not,” Daniel replied, unphased by her question.  “Oh, and do you have any ranch?”

Elle looked at Daniel in shock. Perhaps she was anticipating more sadness from Daniel over his father not showing.  A part of Daniel shared in that surprise, but he also felt relieved that he would not have to deal with the incredibly awkward situation.  Still, those words in the bathroom troubled him.  Daniel tried to keep them as far from his mind as he could while he and Elle ate together.

They got their check and Daniel left the money on the table.  He thanked Susie as they left, but she did not take much notice.  “I swear you can see rain clouds hanging over that girl’s head,” Daniel whispered to Elle, opening the front door for her.  At the car, Daniel escorted Elle back into her seat.  She looked at him long and hard while he put the keys into the ignition.  “You’re not going to wait around for him,” she asked.

“I didn’t think he would come.  Plus if he had showed up, the bartender probably would have seen him and said something to me when I was talking to him.”

She paused for a moment, mulling over Daniel’s decision to leave.  She probably felt like he was running away, not wanting to face him, which a part of Daniel was.  However, if he really did write everything on the bathroom door, Daniel gathered that it would be the only conversation they would be having tonight.  “I suppose you’re right,” she said, resting back in her seat.  Daniel turned the keys in the ignition and drove out of the parking lot.

“Thanks Elle,” Daniel said still focusing on the road.

He could feel her eyes on him.  “For what,” she questioned.

“For coming.  I know that you didn’t have to, but I am really glad that you did.”  He reached over and took her hand.  “Really glad,” he said, taking a second to glance over at her.  Her fingers tightened around his and Daniel smiled before focusing back on the road.  Even if he did not get to meet my father, this was well worth the trip.

It was about eight thirty when they got back to the apartment.  Daniel’s mother would not be home for hours and Elle’s parents never really paid any mind to her leaving.  They had all the time in the world.  Daniel and Elle took their shoes off at the door and she sat down on the couch.  Daniel walked over to the entertainment system and began fanning through the DVD’s.  “Are you feeling something Burton, or something more horror-based,” he called back to her, never taking my eyes off of the DVD’s.

“Hmm,” she sang to herself.  “A little of both.”

Daniel slid the DVD out of its row and showed it to her.  Sweeny Todd.

“Perfect,” she said smiling.

He opened the DVD player tray and placed the CD inside.  Grabbing the remote, he pressed close and then play and sat down next to her, leaning against the arm of the couch.  Instead of the usual sitting on opposite ends of the couch, Elle began to nudge her way next to Daniel.  She looked up at him while Johnny Depp began to serenade us.

“You were going to ask me something, back at the bar,” she smirked playfully.

Don’t you dare, Daniel thought to myself, beginning to feel his face flush.  “Huh,” he asked, pretending not to know what she was talking about.

“You were going to ask me to prom, weren’t you?”

Daniel’s heart dropped, but he kept my eyes on Johnny Depp singing to Ms. Lovett.  He could feel her smiling that I’ve-got-you smile.  “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Daniel replied, getting up and walking over to the fridge trying to find a drink and regain his emotional control.

“You were going to ask me to go to prom, weren’t you?”

He was getting cornered.  It took Daniel several moments to muster up the courage to take his head out of the refrigerator, the cold air cooling the heat swelling in his cheeks.  He turned to face Elle, her hands behind her back, leaning towards him on her tip toes.  Her eyes had a new kind of shimmer in them; they seemed more alive than they have been.  But there was also fear, perhaps of rejection.  Daniel closed the fridge door and looked at Elle.

“Do you really want me to take you?”

“I want you to ask me,” she said smirking.  Daniel’s stomach wound in itself, those blue eyes staring up at him, he swallowed the words caught in his throat, face burning.

“Elle,” he began to ask, looking into her eager eyes. His mind racing back to all of the times that they were with each other, all of the times that she would come over to his house, all of the times that he would hold her, sobbing as she ran away from another one of her parent’s fights.  Years and years that they were together have come down to a couple of defining moments, and now everything was about to change, for the both of them.  “Do you want to go with me to prom?”

Her smile stretched further than it seemed possible, her arms wrapping around him.  Daniel embraced her as she buried her head in his shoulder.  “I’d love to,” she said, leaning her head towards his ear.  They stood there for a moment, bodies practically trying to fuse together.  They pulled back and stared at each other.  Daniel felt himself, again caught in her gravity.  She closed her eyes and began to lean in.  His nervousness was now causing his hands to tremble as he held her.  Daniel wanted her, needed her, and she was more than a friend to him.  He closed his eyes and leaned in, their lips pressing together for the first time in their lives.

Hours passed as they laid on the couch, Elle’s head resting against Daniel’s chest, their fingers intertwined.  Are—are we dating, he thought to himself, glancing down at Elle, her gaze transfixed on Johnny Depp as he began to slash throats and dump bodies into the basement of Lovett’s Meat Pie Emporium.   His mind was racing with questions, with fantasies.  His body was washed over with overwhelming happiness and peace, as though he had just found that missing puzzle piece after all of these years.  Daniel began to run his fingers through Elle’s hair and he could feel her cheek tightening against his frame with a smile.  She looked up to him, locking into his gaze.

“Are we dating,” she blurted out without restraint.  Daniel’s heart jumped in his chest.

“I—um—do you want to?”

“I don’t know,” she said.  “Do you?”

Daniel narrowed his gaze, angrily, “Elle.”

“Dan.”

He stared at her for a moment, her eyebrows furrowed into a fake scowl.  Elle’s intense gaze caused a break in Daniel’s frustration, and a smile was brought to his face.  “Yes,” I laughed.  “I do want to date you, Bella Elizabeth Owens.  Do you want to be my girlfriend?”

“I most certainly do, Daniel Aaden Hart.”  Her voice earnest and sincere, eyes softened into a look Daniel had not yet seen before.  A sort of yearning passion lingered in her eyes as the words rang through the empty apartment.  Even Sweeny calmed his swelling rage as though the very utterance of Elle’s desire hushed the world around.  Time stood still as they stared into each other’s eyes.